The Lounge
by walked-into-the-sky
Summary: A Harry Potter spin off of the Office, taking place mostly in the Hogwarts Teacher's Lounge. Focuses on the relationships between the teachers. Slightly AU, Snupin slash.
1. The Pilot

This is just a sort of experiment. I was watching the Office today and I was just, you know, thinking and I came up with this idea of doing a sort of Harry Potter version of the Office and calling it the Hogwarts Teacher's Lounge, or "The Lounge" for short. Yes, the wizards have television in this story and I call the network the show is on WizTelevision. And yes, I will have interview scenes and whatnot and the style may be a little weird, but like I said, it's an experiment. And just in case I made it confusing, in the interview scenes the only person that is talking is the person who is being interviewed. The interviewer has no dialogue.

And I _know_ I have a ridiculous number of WIPs, but I can't focus on just one piece at a time. It doesn't _work_ for me; I don't have that type of attention span. So yeah, here's another multi-chapter fic that I'm starting. Don't judge.

This story will be AU because it takes place after the war and Snape and Lupin are still alive (again). Also, the main romance, or the "Jam" if you will, is Snupin. So, don't like slash? Run far, far away.

It will also focus on the various, random relationships between various professors. So yeah. Like, review and stuff. Thanks.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the Office.

_**The Pilot**_

_**The Hogwarts Teacher's Lounge**__ really brings the citizens of the wizarding world inside the workings of the famed school as well as giving a spice of humanity to the teachers that are so famous for their stark defiance of the Dark Lord. From Minerva to Severus to Remus, it is a portrait of the war veteran with a splash of teenage debauchery. It is the best show on WizTelvision._

Remus Lupin stares blankly into the camera.

"The harshest critics at the Prophet said that?"

--

_September, 22__nd__, 1997_

The Hogwarts Teaching Lounge is a simple room, decorated with mahogany tables and red, poufy arm chairs. There is typically a fire roaring, even in the summer because the room is tucked deep within the castle walls and situated over the one of the draftier dungeons. The only stand out piece of furniture is a large, oak armoire that holds the teacher's spare robes. More often than not, there are only one or two teachers in the room at one time. Today it is Remus Lupin and Severus Snape, who are sitting in arm chairs that do not face each other and are making a point of not acknowledging that there are other people in the room, not the camera crew and most certainly not each other.

--

Remus smiles weakly and leans back against the hallway wall.

"Severus and I…our history isn't exactly…good. I mean, when we first met, I thought we could be friends," he pauses, a small, sad smile sliding onto his face, "Needless to say, the rivalry between him and James Potter, one of my dearest friends, was infamous during our school years. I suppose you could say he dislikes me on principle."

"–What? How do I feel about…?"

He looks down at his hands.

"I've never disliked him."

" –Why?"

Remus's eyes stare back into the camera blankly.

"I don't really know."

--

"Lupin," Snape says suddenly without looking up from the essay he's currently scrawling ugly red marks all over, "I saw you talking to Potter yesterday. Why?"

Remus stops grading his own papers and turns slightly to look around the arm of his chair, though he still can't see Snape because of the position of the chairs, "He was asking me for advice."

"What sort of advice?" Snape demands softly. Remus looks up at the camera quizzically and frowns.

"What does it matter, Severus?"

Snape grits his teeth visibly and his grip tightens on his quill, "Lupin, just answer the question."

Remus's expression becomes even more confused and he shrugs at the cameras, "He and Ginny's anniversary is coming up. He wanted advice on what to do for it. Told him they should just spend some time together, do something romantic, if that matters at all to you."

Snape snorts nastily, "I could not possibly care less about Potter's love life," he rolls up the undoubtedly destroyed essay and gets to his feet, "By the way, if you want your wolfsbane, come pick it up tomorrow. I am not bringing it halfway across the school to you."

--

Remus picks at a loose thread on his rather old, frail looking set of brown robes and leans backwards into the arm chair.

"I'd like to think I've gotten to know him fairly well, we've known each other for near thirty years, after all, but honestly? I have no idea what that was about."

--

Snape glares up at the cameras from his seat behind the desk.

"War hero or not, Remus Lupin is still a werewolf. That's all the explanation you need."

--

Filius Flitwick and Pomona Sprout sit later at one of the two mahogany tables in the Lounge sipping tea and ignoring the pile of essays they each have sitting beside them.

"Neville Longbottom's come quite a long way," Flitwick comments and Pomona nods avidly, smiling.

"He's been brilliant lately. Absolutely brilliant."

"I was pleasantly surprised at how much he'd improved at the beginning of this year. I mean, he worked so hard before he disappeared last year, but he must have been practicing the entire summer. He doesn't even hesitate anymore and Merlin knows that was his biggest problem," Flitwick plucks an essay from the top of his pile and the camera zooms in on the name, revealing that it belongs to the student in question, "Even his writing's more confident. He's growing more and more like his father every day."

At that moment, Remus wanders in holding a tea mug and smiling distractedly, "Hello, Pomona, Filius," he greets softly and they both turn to look at him, offering their own hellos.

Remus makes his way over to the fireplace where, as the camera focuses there for the first time, there is a folded bit of parchment lying on the mantle. He grabs it and immediately shoves it into his pocket and jumps when the door swings open and Snape, who is entering and obviously looking for Flitwick, as he zeros in on the tiny man at once, starts speaking, "Filius, I need you to—" Snape stops as he catches sight of the stunned look on Remus's face and scowls at him as he stands there, looking remarkably similar to a deer in the proverbial headlights, "What, Lupin? What the hell are you staring at?"

Remus blinks and, as though coming out of a trance, shakes his head slightly, "Nothing, Severus," he glances surreptitiously at the camera, "I was just leaving."

He crosses the room in four quick strides and brushes passed the Potions Master and into the corridor. Snape frowns at the fire for a moment before turning back to Flitwick.

"I need the exact brew of the Soothing Solution you wanted, Filius," he says pointedly, "Give it to me at dinner."

He then spins and stalks out in Remus's wake.

Sprout and Flitwick exchange a glance.

"I wonder if Remus realizes how obvious he's being?" Sprout asks, looking almost amused.

"I wonder if Snape's thick skull will ever get the less than subtle message?" Flitwick adds, his lips twitching into a smile.

--

Minerva McGonagall stares severely into the camera.

"As headmistress of Hogwarts School, I make a point of not interjecting myself into the personal lives of my teachers."

Her look becomes even more disgusted.

"—Why? Because it's not my business who they choose to have consensual, romantic relationships with. If Pomona and Filius were to take up with each other, it would not my place to pass judgment, even if I am their superior. I am also still a teacher at this school."

She blinks.

"—Snape and Lupin? No. What is between them is their business and I would never, ever try to force something that wouldn't happen naturally. And no, that does not mean I do think there is anything between them. Like I said, it's their business."

McGonagall's mouth becomes a thin line.

"I don't care if this will be good for the school in showing that we've rebuilt a stable learning environment. Interfere with any of the relationships between _any_ of my teachers and I _will_ have you removed from the grounds. Thank you."

She gets up and leaves and the camera turns to watch her stalk moodily down the hallway and round a corner out of sight.

--

Remus cocks his head.

"What was the paper I was getting? Oh. Erm, it was a list of things that I…this is going to sound ridiculous for someone pushing forty, it's a list of things I want to do with my life. Or rather, that I would _like_ to do with my life."

He smiles nervously.

"—What's on it? Well, I mean," he reaches into the folds of his robes and tugs out the folded and obviously old piece of parchment, "I've had it since I was sixteen," he explains as he opens it and frowns down at the list, "Let's see. Teach, which," he gestures around vaguely with his free hand, "I'm obviously doing. That's been crossed off. Erm. Apologize to Sirius for immediately assuming his guilt. I did that too. –You want ones I haven't done?" his frown becomes more pronounced and his brow begins to furrow, "Well, take care of Harry Potter. Which I'm doing, or trying to do anyways. Erm…oh, here's one, work with the Ministry for werewolf rights which…I mean, this is getting kind of political, so I probably shouldn't have mentioned it at all. Visit Rome, which I plan on doing this summer. Purchase a decent flat. Tell Se…"

He breaks off and his expression turns closed off. He looks up at the camera once, quickly, before his gaze darts away off over the lens and stares into the distance.

"Erm, yes, that's basically the sort of things that are on there. Look, I have this pile of papers to grade and I should really get to work on it, so I'll just…be going…"

The camera has zoomed in on his face and, more importantly, his dejected expression as he looks back down at the list he holds on his lap.

"Yes, I'll just be going."

He gets up and leaves.

**_Produced by WizTelevision _**


	2. The Letter

Thanks for the reviews. You guys are awesome.

I don't own Harry Potter or the Office.

Jim, Snape, and Lupin are all super sexy though.

_**The Letter**_

_October 17__th__, 1997_

Severus Snape, Remus Lupin, and Poppy Pomfrey are currently occupying the Lounge. Poppy and Remus are sitting together beside the fire and facing each other, while Snape is sitting with his back to them, reading the _Evening Prophet_.

"_Remus_," Poppy says softly, her eyes on the nasty, slowly healing scratch that slides from right beside Remus's left ear to the space where his infamous dark circles rest under his eyes, "Really, _have_ you been using the lotion I gave you for the cuts?"

"Of course, Poppy," the werewolf replies soothingly, "But my natural healing abilities will be enough from this point on."

--

Remus nods at the camera, sitting in the first row of an unused classroom.

"Yes, being a werewolf does give me natural healing abilities and yes, I do tend to rely more on them than potions."

--

Poppy frowns, standing alone in front of the doorway to the Hospital Wing, "If you ask me, Remus is a masochist and _that_ is why he always refuses my healing potions."

--

The camera zooms out to include Snape in the shot just in time to catch him rolling his eyes to accompany his snort. Remus glances over at the back of his chair, stares blankly for a moment, before turning back to Poppy's concerned gaze.

"Really," he adds, "I'm fine."

--

"This full moon, it was more brutal than usual," the werewolf says morosely, scraping at the desk in front of him with his thumb nail, "I mean, it's always bad, but this month I was in worse shape than usual when I woke up. I guess I just have…a lot on my mind."

His sleeve rides up to reveal a rather nasty gash on the lower part of his inner wrist. Remus pulls it back down when he notices that the camera has focused on it and frowns when it returns to his face.

--

A sharp tap sounds on the Lounge's window and all three occupants look up to find a barn owl striking the glass impatiently with its beak. Snape gets up, scowling, and stalks to let it in, only to have the owl simply ruffle its feathers, refuse pointedly to actually fly through the window, and deposit a letter at his feet. He bends to pick it up, tears the simple, plain white envelope open, and quickly reads over it.

An ugly look appears on his face and he spins and stalks out of the room, kicking some chairs out of the way as he goes. Remus and Poppy watch him go in silence before exchanging nervous looks.

--

Poppy sits down on the bed she's in the middle of making in the Hospital Wing.

"I have forgiven Severus for killing Dumbledore," she says adamantly, "And he is a good teacher when he's not bullying students. But he's also so horribly moody and nasty. I swear he's going to give one of the first years a heart attack one of these days."

--

"What was that about?" Remus wonders aloud, twisting in his chair so he can stare at the door that Snape had slammed shut behind him.

"Who knows? Severus is always angry about something," Poppy grumbles and takes a sip of tea.

--

At dinner, Snape's mood has obviously not improved. He sits between Remus and Minerva, stabbing rather violently at his food and glaring at any students who dare to talk or laugh too loud. Remus watches him with obvious concern from the corner of his eyes and Minerva frowns at him over her wine glass.

"Something wrong, Severus?" she asks mildly. Snape shoots her a look and then a glare at Remus, who has stopped eating and is making no effort to hide that he is listening.

"Absolutely nothing," he snaps and turns back to his kidney pudding.

Minerva and Remus exchange furtive looks over his shoulder.

--

"Are Severus and I friends?" Minerva looks thoughtful as she sits in the headmistress's chair, "Of course. I mean, I consider us friends, and the fact that he makes an effort to get me a gift on Christmas and my birthday makes he think that he agrees with that idea. But he doesn't confide in me. That was Dumbledore. And I don't think he'd ever put himself out there to someone else."

She frowns.

"—Remus? No. Especially not him."

The frown deepens into a scowl.

"—You want the truth? He doesn't have it in him."

--

Snape leaves the Great Hall later than most of the students, so the entrance hall is empty when he enters it. Even from across the vast space, from a corner behind a small indent in the wall, the camera can see the anger in his face without zooming in. Seconds after he begins to prowl across the hall to the dungeons, the door to the Great Hall swings open again and Remus hurries out, looking determined.

"Severus," he calls, as the Potions Master is already halfway across the floor. Snape stops dead, but doesn't turn, and the camera catches a rather peculiar expression on his face. He almost looks worried.

Remus closes the space between them to barely two feet and he stands there, staring at Snape's back and twisting his hands in front of him.

"Listen, I know something's bothering you and I'm not going to harass you into telling me. But…" he pauses and notices the camera for the first time, just as it zooms in on his face. He stares for a long moment before continuing, his blue eyes remaining locked on the lens, "I just wanted to remind you that I'm here, if you need me."

Snape's expression has turned blank and he stares at the door he's so obviously intent on escaping to, "You've made that infinitely clear before now, Lupin," he hisses before stalking off.

Remus stands in the middle of the hall and stares after him for a minute before turning and slowly moving towards the marble staircase.

--

"Lupin is a lot of things," Snape says, the stone wall of his office oozing behind him, "but a friend of mine is not one of them."

--

_October 18__th__, 1997_

At around five o'clock the next morning, Snape is alone in the Lounge, rereading the letter that had made him so furious the day before. The cameraman watches, hidden within the wardrobe that holds the teacher's spare robes. Snape drops it on the table in front of him and glares at it. There is a silence as the Potions Master fumes, staring at the offending paper as though willing it to burst into flame.

A shriek breaks the quiet, sounding a few corridors away from the Lounge and Snape gets immediately to his feet, his eyes on the door and his wand already in his hand. There is a pause and then the screamer calls out again, making it clear that it is, indeed, Filch and he is, as usual, complaining about something Peeves did. Snape looks torn, it's obvious he doesn't want to deal with Filch's attitude regarding the poltergeist and yet, if the resounding crash that follows Filch's screaming is any indication, Peeves has actually done something deserving of the caretaker's rage this time. Snape grumbles something inaudible under his breath and leaves the room. The paper, however, stays put on the table.

The cameraman rises up as high as he can within the confines of the wardrobe, intent on getting a picture of the obviously dreadful letter, and zooms in on the paper. The camera manages to catch a glimpse of the last line, written in large, bold letters that dwarf the rest of the page, _"If you don't tell, I will,"_ before the door swings open a second time and a rather sneaky looking Remus Lupin slides into the room.

The werewolf casts a quick look around the Lounge and, apparently satisfied that it's empty, crosses immediately to the letter and picks it up with obvious intent to read it. The camera zooms in on his face and watches as his brow furrows as he scans the words. He frowns at the parchment for a long moment before the crew decides it's time to talk and exits their various hiding places. Remus gawks at them and then turns beet red, dropping the letter minutes too late to matter.

"I," he begins defensively, "was concerned."

"—You put the last lines on the _show_?" Remus looks horrified at the prospect, "Are you mad? Severus will murder every last one of you if he finds out. What was I doing? I told you, concern. I was worried he was in trouble."

"—is he? Who's blackmailing him? Really, you'd think you hadn't promised us all privacy when you pitched the show," Remus folds his arms defiantly, "And none of that's any of your concern."

"—Why is it _my_ concern?"

The werewolf looks away, out the window at the lake that's just barely visible and shining in the sunrise. His expression turns pensive.

"Because I care."

_**Produced by WizTelevision**_

The WizTelevision producers would really, really like it if you guys reviewed. Like, really.


	3. The Dates

Thanks for the reviews. I feel loved.

Don't own either of them; such is my unfortunate lot in life.

Also: I _adore _Luna Lovegood. I promise you. Any and all comments made by teachers come strictly from the teachers.

_**The Dates**_

_October 24__th__, 1997, Late Evening_

Poppy is alone in the Lounge when the door swings open to reveal a rather windswept Rubeus Hagrid. She blinks up at him over her _Evening Prophet_ and smiles, "Good evening, Hagrid," she says and Hagrid, who's busy taking off his moleskin coat, merely grunts in response. He tosses the large mass over the back of one of the empty armchairs and wanders across the room to the largest chair in front of the fire—obviously designed to suit him—and slumps into it. Poppy watches with interest for a moment before closing the newspaper and folding it on the round table in front of her.

"Something wrong?" she asks kindly and Hagrid grunts again, sinking down as far into the chair as a man his size can. Poppy exchanges a knowing look with the camera before getting to her feet and joining him in front of the fire.

--

"Hagrid is a sweet man," Poppy says, her eyes keen on her knitting, "A very sweet man. But Merlin help him, he's horribly shy. And while he and Maxime are, for lack of a better term, in a relationship, it's not going to go anywhere unless he takes the initiative."

--

"How was dinner with Minerva and Maxime?" the nurse puts her hand on Hagrid's bulky shoulder. The camera man circles around to stand beside the chair, careful to keep a respectful distance. Hagrid grimaces through his beard.

"Fine," he grumbles in a way that suggests it was not at all fine. Poppy shoots another significant look at the camera.

"You and Maxime seem to be getting on well."

"Well 'nough," Hagrid's still staring at the fire, looking nothing short of devastated. Poppy strokes his shoulder.

"How about this," she says kindly, "How about we plan a nice, romantic evening for the two of you?"

Hagrid turns his shaggy head and the camera jerks to the left just in time to see the almost childlike wonder in his face, "Jus' the two of us?" he asks, as though hardly daring to believe it.

Poppy smiles and pats his arm, "Just the two of you."

--

_October 25__th__, 1997, Lunch Hour_

Remus Lupin is standing by the teacher's lounge window, holding a mug of tea and staring. Behind him, Minerva McGonagall is shifting through a large pile of what appears to be second year homework.

"Quidditch practice is starting soon," Remus says offhandedly. Minerva glances up at the camera, then at the werewolf's back.

"Yes," she says with equal ambiguity. There's an awkward pause and the camera drifts almost uncertainly between them.

"Are you concerned?" Remus asks suddenly, softly, and the camera man has to take a step closer to fully pick up on the end of the question. Minerva looks up again, her expression guarded, and refuses to acknowledge the crew's presence.

"No," she says firmly, "I'm not. We should just let things play out."

Another silence falls. Remus leaves five minutes later.

--

The camera crew catches Remus alone outside of his office later and he looks like he's on the verge of losing his temper with them.

"_Yes_, I told Minerva," he says exasperatedly, "Why? Because she's the Headmistress and therefore his boss. And," he looks away, his expression drawn, "she's also his closest friend. So really, if anyone can do anything about it, it's her."

He looks back, shocked.

"—Confront him?" Remus scowls, "You saw how he reacted to my offer of support. Severus Snape would rather eat dragon dung than confide in me. You know that," he turns to his office door and opens it with more force than necessary, "Don't ask stupid questions," he throws over his shoulder before shutting the door in the camera's face.

--

Minerva doesn't look up from her desk.

"I trust Severus to handle any and all problems he may or may not have on his own," her grip tightens on her eagle feather quill, "I expect you to respect this as well."

--

Poppy and Filius are in the lounge that evening, Poppy is knitting and Filius is reading what appears to be a book on the art of sweetening charms.

"Just so you know," Poppy says suddenly, as they've been sitting in silence for quite some time, "I saw Luna Lovegood eating what appeared to be a cluster of frog eggs earlier today in the courtyard. I would have stopped her, but Minerva passed her and seemed quite unconcerned."

Filius grimaces, "Oh, yes," he closes his book and his eyes, "Well, they're not hurting her. And she's absolutely convinced they ward off some creature of her father's, so I figure it's best not to try and put a stop to it. The girl's brilliant," he added, glancing awkwardly at the camera, "as is her father, but as they say. There is a fine line."

Poppy looks at the camera too, though she seems much less uncomfortable, "A _very_ fine line," she says softly and Filius shoots her a strained look. She stares back pointedly and shrugs.

The door swings open to reveal Pomona, who is holding a large potted plant and looking determined.

"I don't care what Minerva says," she says flatly when both Filius and Poppy shoot her looks of borderline disbelief, "This room needs some more character, especially because of this," she waves absently in the direction of the camera crew and starts towards the window sill. Filius watches with a mix of interest and apprehension.

"What is it?" he asks, leaning forward to examine the large green leaves through his spectacles, "Or, can Minerva possibly consider it dangerous? You remember that Venus Fly Trap."

Pomona scoffs and folds her arms, "That Venus Fly Trap was an anomaly. How was I supposed to know it'd develop a taste for Snape's hair?"

Poppy rolls her eyes, "You _are_ a Herbology expert."

The tiny Charms Master starts prodding the leaves, "Pomona, is this a _fichus_?"

Pomona looks extremely pleased with herself, "Minerva can't complain about _that_, can she?"

Filius looks a mix of amazed and disturbed. Poppy rolls her eyes again, "Brilliant, Pomona," she says sarcastically, earning a glare, "Listen, now that I've got you both here, I need a favor."

Pomona looks as if she's about to flatly refuse to do anything the nurse wants her to, but Filius catches the look and speaks up hastily, "What do you need, Poppy?"

Poppy leans forward, grinning wickedly, "I'm helping Hagrid out. We need romance and we need it for tomorrow night."

--

Poppy's folding sheets and trying and failing to look stern.

"And if getting Hagrid his engagement pushes Pomona and Filius together, so be it."

The camera zooms in on her face. She's grinning.

_**Produced by WizTelevision**_


End file.
